Separated at birth?

Perhaps, but Neelix is a better dancer and far more handsome.

Kansas Chainsaw Massacre

AP Photo/Travis Heying

"Y'all kin use my chainsore, since yours are in Eye-Rack. Y'all 'll have to buy your own gas."

Shameless commerce division

This is not me.

Not commerce per se, but shameless none the less. For those of you looking for a worthy cause, how about supporting cancer research by sponsoring me in the Prouty. I'll be cycling my first century (100 miles) to celebrate, commemorate my first half century on this planet.
Donate here. If I get enough donations, I get a new set of curb feelers and a half pair of fuzzy dice.

We are all of us affected by cancer. I recently found out that my father's cousin's son (I'm from the south so I should be able to just whip out the relationship, I think he would be my second cousin once removed, feel free to correct me) has been diagnosed with cancer that is pretty far along. His mother will be 99 next week, a little hard of hearing, but bright eyed and sharp as a tack. I hate for her to have this burden. It's extraordinary to think of, but her grandparents could remember when Lincoln Davis was president. Wow. I'll have to dig out my family tree.

Nancy ordered toad in the hole

(REUTERS/Jason Reed)

but ended up with Spotted Dick.

I can never remember ...

Joe Klamar/AFP/GETTY IMAGES

Which one is Not Jenna?

Protocol lesson

AFP/File/Saul Loeb

"I say, is one expected to eat the worm?"
Preznit bush teaches the Queen the fine points of American culture.

Does Rudi Know?

REUTERS/Jason Reed

"Heheheh, does Rudi know you stole his wife's hat?"

Thank FSM for small favors

Thank FSM for small favors.

Bush has yet to visit R.I., Vt. as president.

From here. As a resident of the Green Mountain state, all I can say is yay. With senators like we got, Chimpy might just be a little worried about the reception around here. Not to mention the fact that Vermont, on a per capita basis has suffered the highest casualty rate of any state in the Iraq war/occupation.

Today's fun fact about Vermont:
Public nudity is legal in Vermont, though not disrobing in public.

Bush channels JFK (almost)

Reuters/Yuri Gripas

"Ich bin ein pendejo."
"Feliz Cinco de Mayo, y'all"

You don't need a republican to know which way the wind blows

Senator James Infhofe (R-Knuckleheadistan) demonstrates his patented proto-plasmic anemometer and nasal excavator.
Skip to this story to see an article about the economic costs of carbon mitigation. The short version, it doesn't really cost that much. My version, we can't really afford not to.

House arrest anyone?

I saw this on ABC news. The White House press office has handed out yellow cancer bracelets that say 'Tony Snow' to reporters. Theatre much? The press corpse are not your friends, Pony. Please stop trying to get jiggy with them.

I would also be sure to check these bracelets for RFID tags and hidden microphones.
If it turns out that these are actually monitors, I think Martha "Caged Heat" Stewart knows how to trick them.

Commander Guy action figure unveiled

Available from www.tapirback.com

Plastic Junk R Us has unveiled their latest action figure in the Political Knucklehead line. The new Commander Guy is very realistically lifelike, it makes rude noises, does nothing of consequence, and stinks.

Arctic-pocalypse Now

Photos from NASA

Arctic ice cap melting 30 years ahead of forecast.

WASHINGTON (Reuters) - The Arctic ice cap is melting much faster than expected and is now about 30 years ahead of predictions made by the Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change, a U.S. ice expert said on Tuesday.

This means the ocean at the top of the world could be free or nearly free of summer ice by 2020, three decades sooner than the global panel's gloomiest forecast of 2050.

No ice on the Arctic Ocean during summer would be a major spur to global warming, said Ted Scambos, a glaciologist at the National Snow and Ice Center in Colorado.

Open water is a major heat absorber. Ice is a great reflector. Less ice, more heat, warmer water. Warmer water, later freeze in the fall and less ice, and so on and so forth. Blather, rinse, and repeat. This is the worst news that's come out in while.

Evolution a reality

Can we finally end the intelligent design discussion?

Photos from the AP and the Scotsman

I hate it ....

when I get Soylent Green stuck between my teeth.